How obsessive are you about your romance writing aspirations? Do you think about your story and characters all day long? Do you dream about them? How often do you find yourself talking or thinking about your current work in progress?
Many artists become obsessed with their work. They get laser focused on their current project and everything else falls by the wayside. And while many romance writers are quite even keeled, I have certainly come across those who write obsessively for days, weeks, and even months. They become obsessed with their story.
Is this obsession a positive one or a negative one?
Yes, there can be positive obsessions. The word “obsession” has a negative connotation but think about it like this…a positive obsession
- Generates positive results
- Supports the obsessed to feel positive and empowered
- Creates a sense of joy and enthusiasm in the obsessed
Negative obsessions tear you down. Positive obsessions build you up. I think that often times we feel guilty about our obsessions. But here’s the thing, if your obsession is a positive one then there’s really nothing to feel guilty about, right? Sure maybe your home is a little dirtier than it should be but “should” is a relative term right?
You get to decide what you should or shouldn’t do. And maybe your children, friends, or spouse miss you while you’re obsessed with your book. They’ll reap the benefits of it and you probably support them with their positive obsessions, right?
Can a work in progress be a negative obsession?
Can it have a bad and unhelpful influence on your mindset and your life?
Yes. I think that it can.
The difference in whether it is a positive or negative obsession depends largely on how it makes you feel. So how do you feel?
–Does writing your romance story make you feel positive?
–When you’ve finished a chapter or a scene do you feel productive? Like you’ve accomplished something?
–Do you smile when you talk about your story or think about it?
–If someone asks about how your book is coming along do you snap and snarl at them?
–Do you feel angry, sad, or resigned when you’re finished with a scene and yet you’re unable to stay away from your writing?
You see, there are different ways to approach writing. If your writing feels more like a positive obsession, you’re on the right path.
If, on the other hand you feel like your writing may be a negative obsession, meaning that most days you feel compelled to write even though it makes you feel terrible about yourself, your life, and it brings you down, then consider taking a step back.
There is help for negative writing obsessions.
Consider the following free resources:
And if you’re still struggling, please reach out to me, info @ makealivingwritingromance . com. Let me know what’s going on and together we can devise a plan to reframe your romance writing aspirations into a positive and enjoyable process.