As a romance writer and an aspiring author, you strive to be successful. You learn what you can about writing. You work on your book and you polish it until it’s perfect. In short, you work hard to be successful. However, success demands more than working hard. It demands that you:

Are Comfortable In Your Own Skin

Let’s face it, on your path to success you’re going to come across naysayers. You’re going to face down haters. You’re going to be rejected, ridiculed, and lied to. If you’re not comfortable with who you are and the path that you’re on, then all of these negative people and defeating moments will stop you. They’ll beat you down and you will quit.

Embrace your quirks and trust that they are also your strengths. Stay strong and proud. Your path to success is solid if you hold true to who you are and what you believe.

You’re Willing to Take Risks and Push Your Own Boundaries

On the path to success people will offer you opportunities. The good ones will terrify you. For example, you might get invited to speak, offered a writing or teaching project, or asked for advice. You may feel completely unprepared to handle any of it. Rest assured, if you were offered the opportunity, you can handle it. Take those risks. You’ll be amazed how much you’ll learn, grow, and get closer to your definition of romance writing success.


I’m talking about being honest with yourself and aware of your beliefs, motives, and emotions. On your path to success, you’ll be pushed and tested. If you remain unaware of your thoughts and reactions toward any opportunities or challenges, you won’t handle them in a manner that is best for you.

Here’s an example, I was gung ho to find an agent. It was all I thought about and it was my definition of success (shortsighted, I know). So when an agent offered me a contract, I jumped at it. There were red flags and warning signs all over the place, but I ignored them. I knew this wasn’t the right agent for me. I actually had a great agent who was interested in representing me, but she needed more time. I was afraid of losing the opportunity to get an agent and I didn’t listen to all of the internal signs. Needless to say, that agent didn’t work out and I learned a hard lesson.

Be honest with yourself and get quiet and listen to your inner dialogue and instincts. You know what the right answer is – you always do. Just listen to it.

Finally, I also believe that success demands that you are kind. There’s a belief held by some that it’s a dog eat dog world. I don’t think that’s true. Look around at the successful people you admire. They’re kind. They have big hearts and they live a life that is full of joy and purpose. That, to me, is the purest definition of success.

Happy writing!